10 Ways to Play with Your Kids

When I was preschool-age, my mother used to have tea parties with me and my two siblings. We didn't drag her to the table and then direct her on where to sit and what pretend food and beverage she was consuming. No, my mom would spontaneously show up in our playroom, not as mom, but as the character Penelope Wiliford. (Don't ask me where the name came from). She would loudly announce herself in a funny, British-type accent and invite us all to tea. She was so in character that we didn't dare call her "Mom." Sometimes it was just invisible tea and crumpets on our plastic picnic table, and other times she pretended that our regular afternoon snack had transformed into delicacies of royal caliber. We laughed and giggled and played and had so much fun. Those tea parties with Penelope are some of my most cherished childhood memories, and it is something that my siblings and I reminisce about often when we are together.

I was so blessed to have a mother that was exceptionally talented at all things home related. She is a fabulous cook, and I have copied her recipes often. She was a meticulous housekeeper, and I have held my home to the same standards (most of the time). She taught us all to read before we started kindergarten and made sure we had a solid foundation of faith. Both of those are goals that I work diligently to meet. Despite having three children within a 3 1/2 year time period, she remained charitable and did a great deal of volunteer work and outreach. I have attempted to emulate my mother in so many ways. So how have I forgotten how much importance she placed on playing with us?

I guess I forgot. I got busy. I became the constant caregiver, cleaner and cook, and never really became the playmate. And I really want that to change. I don't want my kids to look back and only remember how clean their house was, how good their meals were, and how much their mommy taught them. Those are all good things. But I want my kids to look back on their childhood and remember how much fun I was too!

10 Ways to Play With Your Kids

1. Build block towers and then knock them over.
2. Turn off all the lights and have a "Flashlight Battle," pretending the beam from the flashlight is the blade of a sword or light saber.
3. Finger paint with them.
4. Take them to the park, get on the swings, and swing alongside them instead of just pushing them.
5. Build an indoor tent out of sheets and camp out.
6. Break out the play-dough, and let your kids suggest what you should make.
7. Get into whatever they are in to. (In my house, this means donning a Darth Vader mask or pirate hat.)
8. Have a Nerf gun or water gun fight.
9. In the summer, have a pool jumping contest. Jump into the pool in different ways (ex. cannon ball, belly flop) and then have your kid copy you. This is extra fun if you have "judges" to decide who had better form.
10. Have a tea party, and really get into it!

This post is linked up to these awesome parties:

10 Ways to Spend Quality Time with Your Husband (On the Cheap)

In keeping with my "10 Ways" posts that have been so popular, here are some of my favorite, inexpensive, quality time ideas. Please also check out my posts 10 Ways to Serve Your Spouse and 10 Ways to Encourage Your Husband With Words.

In my life, with two young children as well as my mother and my best friend all under one roof, finding quality time with my guy can be pretty challenging. Often, by the time we have a few minutes alone, we just want to veg out in front of the tv or sleep. It's sad, but true. Yet, quality time is so important to the health of my marriage. Without connecting in a quality way, my husband and I risk becoming distant from one another. We could easily get so caught up in the necessary tasks of our everyday life that we become more like roommates or business partners than a married couple.

When you add financial limitations to a full schedule, quality time can seem impossible. So, here are my ten favorite ideas for spending quality time with your spouse on a budget. Many are free, and the others are pretty inexpensive.These aren't all necessarily "dates" but could definitely work as a date-night activity.

1. Go to a drive-in type restaurant, get a milkshake, sit in the car, and talk.
2. Take a walk through your neighborhood without the kids.
3. Go sightseeing in your own town. Research historic sites that are free or cheap to visit.
4. Take a picnic to a local park.
5. Play board games, cards, or dominoes together after the kids are asleep.
6. Go to a restaurant, order an appetizer, and talk.
7. Look through your old photo albums or watch home movies together.
8. Bring him lunch at work (home made or take-out) and then eat it with him at his office.
9. Work on a project together, like yard work or washing your cars.
10. Go ice skating! (our area has an indoor rink that is open year-round and is really inexpensive)

Any other ideas? What do you do to sneak in some extra quality time with your honey?

Linked up at

The Best Chili in the Universe

This really is the best chili in the universe...to me anyway. I have tried a billion gazillion variations of this formula, but I always go back to this one. It is great for the slow cooker, but you can simmer it on the stove too. And as you can see in the photo, it is good on everything. I serve it on hot dogs, over fries or tots, and on top of a bed of corn chips. I have also melted it into Velveeta for a yummy dip. I often freeze the leftovers in single portion sizes to pull out for lunch on a cool or rainy day. It is a fall favorite! I make it a lot on game days, it is a perfect football companion.

Ingredients:

• 1 pound ground turkey 
• 1 package original chili seasoning
• 1 package spicy chili seasoning
• 1 can dark red kidney beans
• 1 can light red kidney beans
• 2 cans pinto beans
• 1 32 oz. can crushed tomatoes
• 2 cans Rotel with liquid
• 1 large onion, diced
• toppings: diced raw onion, sliced green onion, shredded cheese, sour cream, saltine crackers, corn chips, hot sauce (like Texas Pete), Sriracha (we like it hot around here)

Brown ground turkey in skillet with diced onion. While the meat is browning, rinse all of your beans. Combine meat with remaining ingredients in slow cooker and cook on low for at least 4 hours. Even though everything is already cooked, allowing the mix to simmer for awhile really melds all those delicious flavors.

I should note that I think I originally saw this recipe on Semi Homemade with Sandra Lee but it's hard to be sure, since I have been making it for like six years.

This post is linked up at the following super fun linky parties:

Weekend Warmth at Western Warmth

10 Ways to Encourage Your Husband With Words

Therefore, encourage each other and strengthen one another as you are doing.

1 Thessalonians 5:11

Last week I wrote a post about serving your spouse. You can read that post here. To date, it is my most read, most shared, and most talked about post. In fact, it has been viewed more than all my other posts combined. This week I am hoping to expand on that idea and give you ten ways to encourage your husband with your words. Men don't tend to be as wordy as women, and yet a man shines when he is praised verbally. I have heard it said that you multiply your praise by the number of people that hear you praising. So, if it is natural and genuine, saying these things to your husband in the presence of others will amplify the effect they have on him. I also sometimes write a short affirmation on a sticky note and stick it on the bottom of his lunch box. He doesn't have to pick it up and unfold it (and face ridicule and jokes from his co-workers), he can simply read it as he is taking out his lunch items.

A word of caution: As a woman, I can tend to do these things with the expectation that they will be reciprocated. I can easily fall into the trap of thinking I have been encouraging him and building him up all week, but he hasn't said a nice thing to me! That is not the goal here. Don't plant that seed of resentment in your heart! It will taint everything that you do for or say to your husband! And don't say things that you do not genuinely mean. If you read one of these affirmations and think That is so not my husband! Don't fake it. He will know that you are insincere. Rather, think of ways that you can genuinely affirm him, and pray about your perception of him in the areas where you think he is failing.

10 Ways to Encourage Your Husband With Words

1. Thank you for going to work every day and providing so well for us.
2. You are so good with the kids!
3. You make me laugh!
4. You really have a talent for ________.
5. You look good in that.
6. You smell good.
7. You are so thoughtful.
8. Thanks for keeping a level head when I am freaking out. You really keep me grounded.
9. You are really smart. (variations: good with our finances, have a great memory, know so much about _____.)
10. I respect you.

I would love for you to share an affirmation that really makes your husband shine! 

Inspiring Great Character III: Thoughts on Obedience

This is Part 3 in my series on character, click to read Part I and Part II.

I have received a lot of questions on obedience and how to teach it. I would like to start this post with a disclaimer:

I am not a parenting expert.

I do not have any fancy degrees to support my theories.

My kids are not perfectly obedient.

I don't know your kid and I can't guarantee what will work for them.

So don't send me any hate mail if you see my son behaving poorly at a play date. It's all a work in progress, people!

Okay, now that we have that out of the way, I would love to elaborate on obedience. 

Let's start by talking about disobedience. What is is really? In my house, disobedience occurs when a child willfully and knowingly rebels against what they have been instructed. As the parent, we have to be sure that we are clear our expectations and consistent in our reactions.

On Saturday my little Man-Cub opened a bottle of nail polish sideways and it glugged out all over his hands, feet and my couch. While the whole situation was pretty frustrating, he was not disobeying. He had never been told "Don't open nail polish." Was it poor behavior? Yes. But it was not willful disobedience, it was simply one of the learning experiences that goes with childhood.

So what do you do in one of these situations? Take it through a series of questions, then react.

1. Have I instructed my child against this behavior?
2. If yes, was I clear about my expectations?
3. If yes to 1 and 2, have the natural consequences served as sufficient correction?

If the situation doesn't pass through question one or two, the behavior was probably just a "kid thing." I can't ignore it or condone it, but it requires teaching and correcting, not discipline.

If the behavior does pass through questions one and two, it requires teaching, correcting and then (if the answer to question 3 is "no") discipline.

The natural consequence often does the job of discipline. A completely extreme example would be; You tell your child not to touch the stove burner. They disobey you and touch it anyway. They are now in pain from being burned. You spank them and scream at them. The spanking and screaming are not necessary, the natural consequence of the burn taught the lesson that you needed it to.

So how can I teach my child to obey?

I have to teach him what obedience is, and why it is important. 

The WHAT:

Obey means that "I listen and I do it!" (clap hands when you say "do it!")

Teach this little phrase to your kids. Practice it with them. Ask them frequently "what does 'obey' mean?" And remind them to be obedient. An example would be saying "Man-Cub, Mommy needs you to pick up those blocks. Please obey me. What does obey mean?" (wait for response) "Great! Now, what did I ask you to do? Thanks for obeying me!"

The WHY:

I always try to explain why obedience is important. "Mommy and Daddy are the boss around here. We all  have to do what our bosses say. Everything we tell you to do is important. We ask you to obey us because we know what is best for you, we love you, and we want you to grow up to be the awesome person we know you can be."

After my kid learned the basic definition of obedience and was pretty clear on the importance of obeying, I needed to teach him how to obey. I addressed this a little bit in Part II. I taught him the little rhyme Obey right away!

Instant obedience is crucial to my sanity.

I remind him to be joyful when he is obeying. Keep a happy attitude!

And now, we are working on being thorough in our obedience. Do the very best you can!

Like I said before, it's all a work in progress. We have multiple instances of disobedience in our home every day. But I can feel good about the fact that we are working on it. I can't just hope that when he is a little older, or a little more mature, all of these character qualities will just fall into place. Good character does not come naturally, it has to be taught. So keep on teaching it diligently!

I love comments! Please share what you do to teach character or a story about obedience, I would love to hear it!

10 Ways to Be Content

I was putting away groceries today when I started meditating on the concept of contentedness. Why is it so difficult to be content with what we have? Everyone I know is discontent about something. Maybe it's their marriage, their home, or their car. Maybe it's their job or the amount of money they make. Maybe they can't quite put their finger on it, but they recognize the restlessness of discontentedness. 

At first, I felt pretty good about this area of my life. But the more I thought about it, the more I realized that there is a spirit of discontent lurking within my heart. I asked myself this question:

"If nothing about my life ever changed, would I be okay with that?"

Would I be fine with keeping this house, this car, and this yearly income? Would I be okay with never having any more children, any new furniture, or making any improvements to my home? If I never gained any more social status or earned any more praise or accolades, would it matter to me?

The truth is, the answer is no. I look forward to adding more children to our family, someday purchasing a bigger and nicer home, and my husband and I dream shop for my next car almost daily. I watch HGTV and daydream about all the home improvements we could do, and how much of my home decor I would like to replace. Maybe that doesn't mean that I am discontent, but it certainly doesn't depict a person that is perfectly content either. I think that the key to deciphering whether my goals and dreams boil down to discontent is whether those hopes and dreams keep me from enjoying what I have right now.

Am I so focused on getting a new car that I look with disdain upon the car I currently own?

Do I covet other homes and home decor to the point that it causes me to dislike the home that I have?

Am I obsessing over the idea of having future children and not appreciating the ones that are in my arms?

The apostle Paul said:

Not that I speak from want; for I have learned to be content in whatever circumstances I am. I know how to get along with humble means, and I also know how to live in prosperity; in any and every circumstance I have learned the secret of being filled and going hungry, both of having abundance and suffering need. 

Philippians 4:11-12

Am I displaying contentment in whatever circumstance I am in? Or am I looking for the next best thing, the bigger, better, more abundant life that is surely around the bend? I am starting to feel that contentment is something to practice diligently. I hope that as I learn to be more content in what I have and who I am, that the joy of that contentment shines through.

Here are 10 ways that I brainstormed on how to practice contended living:

1. Write in a "gratitude journal" frequently.
2. Thank God for what you have.
3. Avoid situations, people and TV shows that cause you to feel discontent.
4. Help out those that have less than you.
5. Memorize Philippians 4:11-12 and recite it to yourself.
6. Stop comparing your life to the lives of those around you.
7. Make simplicity your new mantra.
8. Read stories about historical people groups that have done without (Israelites in the wilderness, Pilgrims, American Pioneers, and many more.)
9. Fast from a certain item for a set amount of time. This will almost surely make you appreciate it when you bring it back into your life (examples are TV, junk food, or shopping)
10. Take a missions trip to a third-world country. Seeing how most of the world lives makes us so much more content with the life we live.

I personally need to remember the lessons on contentedness that I learned on a trip to Nicaragua in 2009, as well as the personal stories of many long-term missionaries I know. It is not easy to be content in the U.S. With a new model of every car each year, a hot new iSomething every 6 months, and the constant parade of excess in the media, we are conditioned to believe that if you aren't looking down from the top you should be looking up at those on top calculating how to get up there. Let's say no to all that, and start living the contented life!

Nicaragua 2009


This blog post was linked up at The More the Merrier Monday

The "TA-DA" List

We all have a "To Do" list, right?

Maybe it is a running mental checklist that you add to and subtract from as you accomplish things.

Maybe it is real, pen-and-paper list that you scratch items off of.

My "To Do" list is on the dry erase section of my awesome 31 Gifts  Hang Up Organizer.

I love this thing, it has transformed the bar in my kitchen, which was once used as a storage site for all the miscellaneous mail and coupons and stuff. Now I have this fantastic product hanging on the door of my pantry, holding said miscellaneous papers. But the absolute best part of this organizer is that white section that you see in the top right corner. That, my friends, is a dry erase area. I have also added cardstock into the other clear plastic pocket in the center, and I also use that as a dry erase area. 

In the middle section goes my everyday "To Do" list. I love to see my accomplishments in front of me, so checking things off a list is really appealing. My list has everything from make coffee to dust & vaccuum to what is for dinner that night.

But this post isn't about the "To Do" list, this post is about the TA-DA List.

The TA-DA list goes on that upper dry erase section. There is no pressure to do things on the TA-DA list. I could go for a week or more without so much as looking at it. But when I actually do one of the things on that list, it feels awesome! 

So what is on this list? The TA-DA list includes household tasks that won't make or break our day, but that would be really nice to get done. These are not seasonal in nature, they have no time frame, and they can range from a 5 minute task to a day-long project.

Currently on my TA-DA List:

• Purge and organize DVDs
• Purge and organize under the kitchen sink
• Go through pantry (donate food we aren't eating)
• Clean the oven
• Clean the microwave
• Purge and organize under the bathroom sinks
• Dust ceiling fans
• Purge kid's toys (donate what they aren't playing with)
• Match all food storage containers with their lids 
• Clean out the "junk drawer"

Some things that I have accomplished since starting the TA-DA List include cleaning out the closet in the master bedroom (that was a full-day project!), sorting through and purging all of last year's papers, purging the Girl-Child's wardrobe of clothes that don't fit, cleaning the top of my refrigerator, and dusting all of the decorative items on the tops of my kitchen cabinets.

Some days I just feel like tackling a project. Other weeks  days I just don't. And that is okay. Because there is no time limit or deadline, I can do these things when I feel like it. But because they are written down in front of me, it's a lot more likely that they will get done than not.

What's on your TA-DA List?

This post was neither sponsored by nor solicited from 31 Gifts. I just really, really love their stuff. If you are interested in purchasing a Hanging Organizer or just want more information on the company and their products, I highly recommend my dear friend and 31 consultant Lauren Hoffman. She rocks!